Getting a swimming pool

Summer is getting close and as I

look at the status of life with Mumzie

and Da, one shortcoming I see is that



we don't have a pool.

You may remember that I'm not a big fan of water.

but in my mind getting a bath is quite a bit different

from having a nice afternoon

Of relaxation.

I have been leaving hints around the house in an 

attempt to get my good idea into the mind of the old

geezer Mumzie decided to take on as a craft

project.

I leave good hints around the house

Who wouldn't want a classy pool like

one of these

Or if you have a spirit of adventure

Maybe this one.

Unfortunately my family sees things differently

This is Mumzie's idea of water in the back yard.

and Da's

Sheeeesh...

Ask ZeroBear - Good and Not So?

Got an e-mail the other day asking,

"Mr. Zero Bear - what can we eat that's good?"

OK, I can answer that question.

#1

Stay away from

Road Kill - Not so good

my preference?

Crusing down the road with Da to the Sonic.
There should have been TaterTots in that photo,
but they got eaten while the photographer was
focusing his shot.

Another No-No?

Yard clippings milkshake.

Yuck! - the cows can have it.

My drink of choice?

Hard to find, but worth the search

That's the 1,800 gallon size mug.

An OK substitute

Breakfast?

Nutritionists

(Mumzie helped me spell that)

say it's the most important meal of the day.

I think anything that's big time important deserves

Waffles!

an OK substitute preferred by

Miz Trin, Happy, Amber and TrailerHitch

Snacks?

I don't do recipes, so don't e-mail any requests for

Mumzie's secret recipe, but here is the very bestest

combination of cereal and marshmellows ever

discovered be a PolyBear.

Mumzie might share the recipe,

but I doubt it. This (figuring out how to make

these could be a suitable life goal for you folks

who stumble through life without goals.

Suitable substitute?

What it lacks in color is more than made up for in

funnelism.

 

You say you're a health food junky?

We have that covered.

The Razzleberry Zinger.

Vitamns R and Z!, sprinkled with vitamin

Coconut!

You're welcome.

Happy Dogs

Dogs seem to handle being happy

better than anyone I know. They really

seem to enjoy life.

Taking a walk is fine with them.

Just hanging around? OK - we can do that.

Watch the world go by? No problem with that.

Want to play ball? Got you covered.

Nap time? I'll get right on that.

Eating? I'd love to.

Even if the menu is a little different today.

Dogs - always happy?

I think so.



Ask ZeroBear

Oh Mr. ZeroBear

What is Happiness?

Easy Peazy

Happiness is

a red balloon

No Comprende?

Well it is!



Becoming a bear

It's not an easy thing.

A study by noted

naturalist and Polar Bear

expert

ZeroBear PolyBear, esq. BS, MS, PhD, &@#

Growing up as a Polar Bear is difficult at best.

You must survive

Being a baby.

Life as a kid brings on a whole new set of problems.

"Mommie loves me the mostest."

"No she doesn't cause you're adopted."

Adolescence is a challenge as you attempt

to find your place among your peers.

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. ...."

Then you strike out on your own.

Sometimes it works out OK

and

Sometimes it doesn't.

There are so many things to learn as you grow up.

How to dance

Sharing

The awkwardness of that first kiss

The down side of saying something you shouldn't

have said.

Handling that embarrassing situation.

learning how to swim

and

learning exactly close you can get

to that nature photographer

before

they

become

an

opportunity

to

serve

as a

tasty

lunch option



We Salute You

Those of us who are brave

(and we know who we are)

Saute the life of bravery as exemplified by

those who know no fear.



What's the deal with tongues?

As I work on my research

Which is a never ending responsibility, I have begun

noticing something that concerns me.

What's the deal with tongues?

And why do they always seem to come out?

Example:

Goofy, but OK

Whoa Nellie! Pull that thing back in a foot or so!

Some of these things give me the Heebee Geebees

Is it normal?

I'm not even sure I have one.

Maybe Mumzie knows.

She's the chief BoBo fixer around here.

If its there she probably hs had to work on it at some point.

I'll ask her after waffles time.

Important stuff first.



Finally

A helpful aid for those who always whine that

they have nothing to do.

Soon to be available at a home improvement store

near you or by mail for only $2,459.87, plus shipping.

Another nifty product from

ZeroBear PolyBear Amalgamated, Conglomorated, LLC

Note:
Color, Design, Content and construction
of your wall kit may vary.

In case of out of stock conditions,

a nice stick, similar in form and construction
to the one shown here may be substituted, carefully
selected for you by ZeroBear PolyBear.