OH NOZE
IT HAS HAPPENED - AN EXCLUSIVE REPORT

by ZeroBear, TakeCareOfTheWorld PolyBear, esq.

I just knew something bad was going to happen today, cause it always does when Friday the 13th falls on a Thursday. Did anyone in the supposed news media establishment tell you that?
  

NO! 

Well, it is true. If you'll check your calendar, you will see two things:

Thing #1 of 2 - A PolarBear (actually three bears) in a scenic view as this month's Bear Photo of the month on the Bear of the Month Calendar (December is PolyBear month and yours truly is featured - photo follows).

Cute, huh? I appear to be excited.

Anyhoo, back to the three bears -  Jeepers they looks cold don't they. I have no idea why they aren't inside on their Chest of Drawers where it's warm. I also has no idea what they are looking at - Maybe a seal or explorer they hopes to have for lunch. You noze, as I looks at the legs on them bears I discovers maybe my yellow leg is genetic.

Next:

Thing #2 of 2 - You will see that it is Thursday - a day named after the mighty Norse Warrior Thu, who had a healthy respect for Bears.

And Next:

Thing #3 of 2 - It is the Thirteenth!

Ergo, Ipso, ExFacto - I ever so smugly rest my case.

Anyhow, I is in hiding until Friday the 14th comes around and it is safer for little PolyBears to be out where Zombies are roaming around on the most recent Friday the 13th that is on Thrusday.

I should be OK until things gets better and this cursed day passes. To keep my strength up, I ordered 2 Kingsize Thick Crust LotzaMeatza and Cheeza Pizzas Extra Cheeza and Meetza - hold the smushrooms from Luggios Pizza Emporium and Stromboli Sammich Parlor. I hopes they understood that the delivery point is the front hallway closet, lower level. Hopefully everything will come out OK. Honestly, the guy on the phone sounded a little creepy and may have been a Zombie. The fact they are out in force today is a well known Zombie Pizza delivery guy fact.

I'm thinking it's every bear for hisself until tomorrow rolls around and it gets safer to face a pizza delivery guy. I know! I'll have Da go to the door and take delivery for me. Shirley he can deal with whatever brain sucking freak happens to be out there with a stack of pizzas for a certain hard to replace PolyBear. The loss of Da's pitifully tiny brain ought to be something Mumzie and I can overcome, should it get sucked out on the front stoop by a soulless corpse revived by witchcraft.

Hope to see everyone when this dark day has passed. Good luck.

Hope them pizzas come on time. This interwebs journalism is hard work and I is famished.