BIG FOOT

A Report on the current state of Scientific Hominoid Investigation by

ZeroBear PolyBear, Esq.

Yo guys - whazzup?

Have you heard about the latest Big Foot sightings? No? Well I haven't either, but that's not going to slow this PolyBear down any. I thought I would bring everyone up to date on my interwebs investigation into this fascinating zoological phenonetestomonia.

Prepare to be amazed.

 

Here is the big guy in his classic pose:

I wonders if he has fleas. Since this first photo of the big guy back in 1967, scientific investigators from all over the world, faithful patrons of 3 beer joints and two tune-up mechanics who work second shift at the Husqvarna chain saw repair shop in Salem, Oregon have been scouring the Northwest woods with cameras, hoping to secure additional evidence of big hairy guys prowling the forests in cheezy ape suits.

Here is leading researcher Buzz Billingsly in the soon to be famous (right after I posts his photo on my internationally perused interwebs blog site) photo of him in the woods pointing driectly at the place where

Big Foot never passed through an opening in the trees.

Next Evidence

Here is a seldom published photo of histerical significance showing Da's Uncle Luther with a Big Footed Beast he bagged with a 12 gauge back in 1927. Seems that Uncle Luther failed to have a license for hunting hairy beasts and spent 18 months on the county farm after this photo was first published in The Arkansas Big Foot Hunter's Ledger, Hog Farmers' Post and Johnny Pot Reader's Gazette.
 

Uncle Luther is the not quite so hairy one on the left.

Next Evidence:
 

This is one of my favorite pieces of Big Foot Evidence, captured out in California on Bismal Beach. Yes, it is the well known Bismal Beach footprints, a photo taken in 1984 by famed Big Foot Researcher and snappy casual dresser Gregory Greenchinos.

Frankly, I is impressed. Yeah, I know, stop calling you Frank
 

(above)

 I understand Big Foot hunters in Oregon are so concerned that sightings have fallen off up there that they have taken to drastic measures to seek out new evidence of the Big Guy's existence.

Good description - "Hair: Everywhere"

However I has my doubts that postings such as shown above 
will ever flush any of the big guys out into the open.

Next - Big Foots  in NY, NY
(A city so nice they named it twice)
 

Evidently the Foot Locker Corporation believes that they can lure the elusive Big Footed beasts out with their latest promotion. If he can dunk or do the alleyoop, I guess the Knicks will sign him. It couldn't hurt them. However I question whether having big feet will help your ball handling skills or your dribble.

Caution!

I understand that some Big Foots are now striking back at the searchers and researchers. Some have even taken to arming themselves against intruders.

evidence?

This specimen has armed himself with a Jedi Knight light saber weapon. Beware seekers, searchers and researchers. The life in danger may be yours.

Conclusions?
 

So, what does the world's leading PolyBear Big Foot expert think about all of this?

I actually saw Big Foot at the Lauderdale County Fair last night.

In fact, I took two photos.

Got the first one from the side and a second photo head on.

Pretty good shots, too. 

Here they are Big Foot entheusiasts.

Side Photo

Head on Photo

Ha Ha - Gottcha

Ok I did manage to find one last photo of a young big foot
for you guys to feast your eyeballs on.

This is one of the rare photos,
because not only is the big foot that is shown
here quite young,
but he is also fairly clean cut.

Ever diligent in service to the scientific world,

ZeroBear PolyBear, Esq.