Hot air relief

It's hot here

and I know that some folks try to cool off with

open windows.

They do improve the

air flow if there is a breeze.

Of course they also allow all sorts of



critters in to harass you.

or at least they try to come in

"Is that waffles I smell?"

Famous Last Words

"I have grown to love you as you
have been studying me
over the past month.

Could I have just one little kiss

before you leave me forever?"



"I guess just one quick kiss couldn't hurt."

Have you ever done something

In the name of adventure

you wish you hadn't done?

I received this from one of the blog's loyal readers

this past week and after careful study I came to the

conclusion that this guy really shouldn't have done

what he did.

What are you talking about Mr. ZeroBear?

Well just look.



Average bear - right?

Just hanging around.

Right?

In my opinion he has messed up badly.

How so?

Let's back out a little and have a look.

Yep.

Bad mistake.

Nice to be included



Becoming a bear

It's not an easy thing.

A study by noted

naturalist and Polar Bear

expert

ZeroBear PolyBear, esq. BS, MS, PhD, &@#

Growing up as a Polar Bear is difficult at best.

You must survive

Being a baby.

Life as a kid brings on a whole new set of problems.

"Mommie loves me the mostest."

"No she doesn't cause you're adopted."

Adolescence is a challenge as you attempt

to find your place among your peers.

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. What do you want to do?"

"I dunno. ...."

Then you strike out on your own.

Sometimes it works out OK

and

Sometimes it doesn't.

There are so many things to learn as you grow up.

How to dance

Sharing

The awkwardness of that first kiss

The down side of saying something you shouldn't

have said.

Handling that embarrassing situation.

learning how to swim

and

learning exactly close you can get

to that nature photographer

before

they

become

an

opportunity

to

serve

as a

tasty

lunch option



Public Service Announcement

Because we care!

That's just the kind of PolyBear we are.

and I'm not sure why we are referring to ourselves

in the plural becasue - rest assurred, there is only

one of us. A fact that brings Da great comfort

when the lawyer bills come rolling in.

I had no idea that bomb was loaded - honestly.

Iguess I got off track.

Back to the public service announcement.



When  a Poly Bear comes for

a visit it's ok to let him in

Order up some Pizza You might want to get two

so there will be some left over for you.

Turn on a rocking NASCAR race.

Have some fun!

HOWEVER,

WHEN A POLAR BEAR

DROPS BY FOR A VISIT

He probably is looking for more to eat than

Pizza and cookies.

And It is a well known fact that most Polar Bears

don't care for late model stock car races, nearly as much

as eating seals, penguins, peoples.

IMO I wouldn't open the door for a polar bear,

or in the example shown here  - the window.

ZeroBear PolyBear, esq - serving humanity 24/7

(or until a more profitable scam comes along)

Does anyone know if those

Fund Raising Pledge-A-Thon things work?

I got this photo in the mail yesterday

He says he is my long lost brother.

Then he asked for money to help him get out of jail.

While I hate to see a bear in chains,

I think I am being scammed.

OK, I'm stumped

Earlier today I posted a photo sent by e-mail

from friend of the blog YoBert BroBert.

Here it is again

After extensive interwebs research I found lots

of things to be excited about.

There are lots of dancing  bears on the interwebs.

And dancing wolves

I even found evidence of wolves

fooling around with bears

(withot gatting eaten)



the interwebs is full of rollerskate dancing

But almost no bear and wolf rollerskate dancing.

I am bumfoozleed, which is a technical term for

verpluxed.

Here is what I think

The wolf is a bear in wolf's clothing.

That makes perfect sense, because bears love to rollerskate

And that's the way I see it.

Culture from the Shakesperean Bear Troop

Macbeth - Act 2 Scene 1

Is this a dagger which I see before me,

The handle toward my hand?
Come, let me clutch thee.

I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.

Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible

To feeling as to sight? or art thou but

A dagger of the mind, a false creation,

Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?

********

Hamlet - Act 3 Scene 1

To be, or not to be, that is the question:

Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer

The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,

Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,

And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep

No more; and by a sleep, to say we end

The heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks

That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wished. To die to sleep,

To sleep, perchance to Dream;

Ay, there's the rub,

********

Macbeth - Act 5 Scene 1

Out, damn'd spot! out, I say!

Culture

from Bears

How fortunate thou art.

Lets do an honest evaluation

Cute?

Yeh I'll give him that

Subject of fan adoration?

Yeh, they know how to work a crowd.

Finicky?

They only eat bamboo and have zero interest in waffles.

I know because I asked, so I gotta say yes.

Dumb as dirt?

You decide - I already have an opinion.



Polar Bears Can Swim!

Yes - Seriously

Did you know that Polar Bears are

pretty good swimmers?

Evidently they spend a lot of time in the water.

Maybe they like a cool dip.

Doesn't seem to bother them at all

It seems like Polar Bears get around in the

water just fine,

but I'm not all that good at swimming

Most of my time in the water is limited to

bath time, and I hate it.

Maybe I need some swimming lessons

so I could learn to take care of myself in the water 

like a polar bear.

I'll have to look into it, because

evidently it doesn't come naturally to all of them and

some need a little help learning.



Do You Know What Polar Bears Love?

All across the frozen northland

Polar Bears large and small

frequently enjoy a break from

the daily routine with a refreshing

beverage, and when they do

Polar Bears always choose Mr. Koke.

It's the soft drink choice of discriminating

bears everywhere.

Mr. Koke

(a trademarked brand of the

KokerCoaler Corporation)

Available at a convenience store,

self service machine or soda fountain

near you.

(this seemingly innocent post earned

ZeroBear PolyBear Web-based Advertizing,

LLC an amazing amount of payola cash.

You too can have our own Blog and

funnel boocoo ad moneys to your offshore

bank account. Learn how by purchasing

"How I used my Blogpage to score big in the Payola Ad Market"

by ZeroBear PolyBear - $14.95 plus postage for a limited

time at http://www.shadybooks.com/)

Bears Get a Bad Rap

so many times.

But my experience is that they simply

aren't that bad.

Somebody painted this bear purple

and illegally incarcerated him. Is he angry?

Well maybe. He doesn't look like the happiest

Purple bear I've seen this week.

This bear offers a hearty handshake and a welcome

to the north pole gift to a visitor.

"Hea, Bro, Whaz'happnin? Nice coat.

Pay no attention to that little guy eating your knee."

In another instance, this seems to be one

of the friendliest Polar Bears you'd

ever want to meet.

What?

Oh...