10 Days Until Christmas - Scary Guys

This guy scares a little PolyBear

Why?

Number 1 he is bad Ugly

He makes Da in the morning look good.

And Da won a prize for Scary Old Dude

of The Year last year from ASODA

(American Scary Old Dude Association)

I entered him in the contest by paying the $50.00 entry fee 

with Mumzie's Pay Pal Account and he won

this lovely thermoformed plastic trophy

that was only $39.95 extra

(shipping not included).

This Grinch guy does the best Da in the morning

impression I has ever seen

Anyhow he isn't scary because of how Da-ugly he is.

He is scary because

he tried to steal Christmas.

and

made little kids cry

He was aided in his dastardly effort by an evil

Demon Dog

However

The story had a happy ending

And the Grinch got his own reality series role on Seseme Avenue

Word is he is in the running to replace Letterman if he ever retires.

Sorry Craig.

11 Days till Christmas

Mumzie made a Pumpkin Roll

MumZie amde a pumpkin roll

Mumzie made a pumpkin roll

AND ZeroBear Stole a Piece

Does this count as being bad, Santa?

it does?

Da took it. And I just had a bite.



On The 12th Day Before Christmas, My Mumzie gave to Me

Waffles!

and a Pair of Cartridges in a Pear Tree

Yep, not just one, she gave me two.

12 Days Left - Christmas TV Specials

Da insisted we watch some old TV movie last night

He said it was special.

I thought that meant it would be like a

Sponge Bob marithon

Patrick is a real hoot. 

I could watch him for hours.

But Da wanted to watch some hunting show.

I never quite figured it out

There was this kid

and he wanted his very own Pig Shooter

Even though he was obviously too young.

I was like 17 or 18

before I managed to get mine and

I am very responsible.

That's a Roomington 12 Gauge Custom Stock Pig Blaster.

Nifty Ain't it! 

You gotta be responsible to own one of these babies!

Stick'em up! 

BLAM!

oops ....

Anyhow,

The kid's mumzie said she didn't want him to have a Red Ryder BB Gun 

cause she said he'd shoot out his eye with it.

How could anyone shoot out their eye?

Oh

I guess I remember that happening to a certain PolyBear

It was an assident.

But the kid in the movie

didn't really shoot out his eye,

He was protected by his glasses

and I think it actually hit him on the cheek.

I was in the kitchen getting hot chocolate

when that scene happened,

but I'm pretty sure

that he missed his eyeball.

If you have seen the movie, you know some 

really wierd stuff happened.

Involving electrical appliances

and

Strange little brothers.

In conclusion, I forgot to mention

It was a Christmas Movie

Sometimes Da is hard to figure out.

But Mumzie loves him.

I think.

What Comes before 13?

12?

I is running out'a time to rack up some I wuz Good Days.

Would anybody like to rent me a few?

I can pay you off with Mumzie's paypal account.

I was counting on Santa for a nice Christmas happy.

I understand he has a big old sleigh with a magic bag that stretches really big to hold bulky objects.

He could just leave it parked in the yard.

I'll be extra good next year Santa

I didn't know about that naughty and nice list thing.

What'ya say?

 

I is going crazy

I didn't know about the "gotta be good" thing!

Why could nobody have told me?

where was Da when I needed him?

Isn't there something I could'a done for extra credit?

Please stop by my house Santa!

We Got Cookies and Mumzie's Special Hot Chocolate!

And

Fish Sticks



13 Days - Mumzie's Divinity

Sorry

Mumzie only made enough for one small PolyBear

Only like 60 pieces, and they were small.

When Mumzie makes that little, you aren't expected to share.

Now my mouth fur is sticky.

But my tummy is all divine.



14 Days - Christmas Friends

Funny - nice

Trusting - Great

Cute (hubba hubba)

By your side

and watching your back.

Priceless



15 Days Left - You Gotta be Good?

Who in the world came up with that?

And he watches?

And Keeps a List?

Razzle Frazzle.

16 Days Left - Yard Displays

Woa Nelly! Look at them lights!

We went riding last night and I was impressed.

I had no idea so many people worked for the power company

and were allowed to bring home free samples

Of left over electricity to use

However they wanted.



It is amazing

Incredible

Gaudy

I loves it!

17 Days until - Candy Canes!

That's not entirely true

because a certain little PolyBear

couldn't wait another 17 days.

He already has some red stains

on the fur around his mouth.

Can't see them? Good - Maybe Da won't notice

and figure out why so many of his soft candy canes is missing

from the back of the top right hand drawer of my chest.

I must have eaten about a hundred of them last night

after I found where he had them hidden.

Peaches and Herb shared one, too

so I'm not entirely to blame.

Yummy

Candy canes are a really nice part of Christmas.

And I like them in just about anything

Mumzie's Special make it once a year

Candy Cane Cake

Cookies (may I have another, please)

Icey Cream (freezes my tonsils if I eats it too fast)

Hot Chocolate (thaws them right away)

Da says his Da used to get it like this for him

when he was a little boy. I have never seen it this way

cause I is often a misstreated PolyBear.

I can't imagine a way I wouldn't like Peppermint

Oh

Scratch that

I guess even a good thing can get pushed too far.

Sorry Aunt Lucy. It just isn't your look.